Sometimes I don’t have the best attitude about my rides. While I recognize good moments when they happen, not every ride is a shining epiphany where it all comes together. Some rides are just average, part good, part bad, part ugly. It’s during these rides that I tend to dwell on the negative. And I don’t even realize I’m doing it.
I hopped on bareback last week for a quick little hack. Just for fun really, not working on anything in particular. Even though I didn’t have any real focus or goal for the ride, when I dismounted my brain automatically filed it in the “bad ride” category. I wasn’t really upset; nothing particularly bad happened. It was just one of those rides where I felt a bit insecure, I was displeased with my position and didn’t feel like I had ridden very well.
I headed back to the barn and while brushing Rigil another rider stopped by and mentioned how good my seat had looked while bareback. I hadn’t even thought about the difference in my seat because I was so focused on how bad my shoulders were. They brought up how far I had come and how much I had improved. I smiled and thanked them for the compliment, but I also made a joke about the ways I had screwed up during my ride.
I think it’s pretty typical for us as riders to brush off someone else’s praise because we are so stuck on the things we feel like we messed up. But why not just believe the compliment? Why not internalize it, feel good about it, and give ourselves permission to celebrate? Why not pat ourselves on the back for a job well done?
We reward our horses for every positive moment, and we help them move on from the negative ones, and I’ve come to realize this is something I need to do for myself, too. How much more positive and confident would I feel every day and every ride if I stopped getting so caught up in the missteps and had more belief in the good.